Kids' Currency Dr. Phil Style

Ever watch Dr. Phil? He is always saying to find your child's currency in order to motivate him or her. Well, I have 5...kids that is, but only 3 that have some type of currency I can hope to manipulate in order to get cooperation (the other two are babies). While I believe in this concept in principle, I've tried various forms of "currency" and it seems that everything NEW seems to work for a while. Does that mean that my newest system is going to fail in the end, and in 6 months I'll be frantically trying to find something else? Let's review.

Two years ago a homeschooling friend of mine (what, is she nuts?) suggested a quarter system. At the beginning of each month the children would receive their allowances up front (there's a catch). It was given in quarters and they couldn't have it yet. Beginning on the first day of the month, I filled each cup with their allowance in quarters (which, by the way is their age). I carefully explained that to move quarters from one cup to another is like robbing a bank, and the consequences for such deception would be swift and painful. Then we reviewed everyone's chore lists and agreed that it is only fair for me to "pay myself" for every one of their chores I had to do. In addition, they would lose quarters for negative behavior. So, if the dog didn't get fed, I'd feed him and take a quarter for the trouble. If the shoes didn't make it into the shoe basket after school, I'd pay myself and put them away. When my oldest daughter gave me attitude, I'd get her cup and stand next to it taking out one quarter at a time until she stopped talking (which is something no 12 year old girl does without pain).

The first month was great! I made $15 right out of the gate. At the end of the month, the kids received whatever was left of their allowance (not happily), and we started over. The next month the kids did much better. They got more of their allowance than the previous month, and I paid myself a lot less. Unfortunately there began to be a breakdown in the system. One of my children, a natural-born limit-tester decided that it was worth a quarter here or there to not have to follow the rules or do certain chores. Her least favorite chore at the time was cleaning the catbox, and she quickly determined that a quarter or even two was a good investment to not have to get within 10 feet of HER CAT'S poop. It started there and took a dramatic turn when she decided it was a worth a whole buck to take a slug at her brother or insult her sister.

On top of that, she began to extort the other kids..."I'll unload the dishwasher for you for 3 quarters". This enterprising tween ended up making MORE than her allowance one month despite $5 in fines paid to me. Clearly, I had to up the ante. I charged her double the other kids for every chore she blew off and triple for negative behavior. Ahhhhh, at last she ended up with a month of NO allowance. What did she do? Did she start doing her chores and treating her siblings with respect? Chewing with her mouth closed? Scooping the cat box? No, she offered to babysit for a neighbor with 2 younger children every week during tennis practice for a small fee and "accidentally" started letting the inside-cat outside.

Who says this generation is stupid and lazy? I, for one, believe they are not STUPID at ALL!